Friday, September 16, 2011

Two Under Two

I apologize for the unexpected blog vacation. I thought for sure I'd be able to keep everyone up to date while I was on maternity leave, but things are a little crazy here. Apparently parenting two under two is, like, hard or something. I am extremely fortunate that Justin is home so we can divide and conquer, but Adriana and Lucia are on opposite schedules. When Lucy sleeps, I try to give Adriana extra attention, and when Adriana sleeps, Lucy goes on a feeding frenzy. Every times I have enough spare time to boot up my laptop, I end up getting sucked into work emails (I am so lame).

The biggest challenge of having two under two has been with Adriana, not Lucia. I think I was overestimating how difficult the newborn stage is, and underestimating the evil toddler stage. Adriana has always been a pretty adaptable kid, so I didn't anticipate how much the newest member of our family was going to impact her. Basically, my sweet, funny, easygoing little girl turned into a colossal pain in the ass the second she realized she wasn't the center of the universe anymore. It's hard to say how much of this personality change is due to Lucy and how much is the terrible twos kicking in, but the timing sucks either way.

I was released from the hospital after just 24 hours, and Adriana came home with us that day. I thought that being home with us and acting like nothing had changed would help ease the transition, but I really should have taken my parents up on their offer to keep her for another night. Once she saw Lucy in my arms, she wanted to be carried everywhere too. Seeing as how she is a solid 28 pounds, that was not going to happen (at least not the first day...I found myself picking her up for short distances soon after, which, while practical, was not the smartest thing in the world). It was just a little MUCH while I was trying to recover.

By about day two, Adriana realized that Baby Lucy was not going back in Mama's belly and was here to stay. She started trying to crawl into my lap on top of the baby while I was breastfeeding, and throwing huge fits when I told her that I couldn't hold her until after I was done feeding Lucy. [Side note: I will never forget the look on A's face the first time she peeked under my nursing cape...wide eyes, and she exclaimed "She eatin' mom's boobies!" with such surprise that I about died laughing]. She also tries to pry my hands off the baby when I am feeding her ("Put it in the swing, mama, put it in the swing").

Once Adriana realized that babies get special attention, she created an alter ego for herself. I couldn't make this up - one day she crawled into my lap and asked me to rock "Baby Adrini". If I call her Adriana when she is in an attention-craving mood, she says, "No, I Baby Adrini" and giggles and snuggles with me. She know's she's being silly, but she also knows it works and I will play along.

All of this would have been pretty darn cute if it weren't for The Whining and The Violence.

The Whining...ugh. It's pretty much all day, every day. It's amplified by a million if she's the slightest bit tired or hungry. It's really hard to be patient with her and not get extremely frustrated when she would rather scream than use her words to tell me why her diapers are in a bunch.

I prefer The Whining to The Violence though. The Violence is actually the one thing that I was somewhat prepared for, since Adriana is a bit of a bully and was already being sent to time out for kicking, biting, etc. The first couple of weeks after Lucy was home, we pretty much couldn't take our eyes of Adriana for a second. She twisted Lucy's foot, pinched her cheek (hard), dug her nails as hard as she could right in the soft spot on Lucy's head, and even STABBED HER WITH A FORK (a kiddie fork, but still). I am SO SCARED that she is going to bite her one day and end up breaking a bone or something. Thankfully, she has calmed down over the last week or so (only one incident, and it was a minor one).

I really hope that all of this blows over soon and Adriana goes back to her normal self. I still have a hard time figuring out how to discipline Adriana when she acts out, and I hate hate hate when I lose my patience and yell at her. Justin and I actually decided to put her in daycare an extra day each week while we are on leave, just to have some stress-free Lucy time, which makes me feel super-guilty (she normally goes once a week, now she goes twice).

In case you are worried that it's all doom and gloom over here, Adriana just walked up to Lucia's bouncy chair, kissed her forehead, and asked if she could hold her hand. Ah, toddlers, capable of such sweetness and such meanness all in the same 10 seconds.


Saly said...

Yes, Bud was the same way (he was 19 months when Lu was born). It blows know until they are 6 and 7 and at each other's throats all the livelong day. :) She'll get past it though.

Can't wait to see some more photos!

Reading (and chickens) said...

Oh, I remember those (dark) days so well. My oldest SAT on the baby. SAT on the baby. And once he slammed his baby brother's hand in his dresser drawer. Ah, siblings. Fun times. (Sending you good thoughts that things get easier.)

d e v a n said...

Oh, hang in there!!!

Jessica said...

I hope things get better soon!