Friday, April 13, 2012

Diniwilk Stew

Some quickie bullets, since it's FRIDAY (WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!!!!!



  • YOU GUYS. Lucy is FINALLY sleeping through the night! Other than some stirring around midnight, she has slept from 7:30 pm to 7:00 am almost every night this week. It is pretty much the best thing ever. Lucy had me fooled when she would sleep for 5 hour stretches when she was a newborn - she turned out to be a much crappier sleeper than Adriana was, both at night and during the day (although I blame the lack of naps on Miss I Have No Inside Voice). Good thing they're cute, right?

  • Since the universe is cruel, all of the extra sleep I should be enjoying is being replaced with work. There have been 4 days in which I worked until 2 am or since 4 am in the past two weeks. I am also going to have to spend much of May working from 7am-10pm, IN COLUMBUS. I will only see my kids on the weekends for a month. Also, I'm salary, so it's not like I'll be making any extra money for my efforts. So yeah, work sucks.

  • My personal life is also insane. This weekend alone, we have my brother's senior art show (which I am excited about), and a wedding shower and 3 kiddie birthday parties (which I am not).

  • On the bright side, I am kind of looking forward to only being responsible for myself while in Columbus. I'll get to sleep until my alarm goes off, take bubble baths while reading Fifty Shades of Gray, and maybe even work out some. I won't have to cook or clean or wipe butts other than my own...that part will be nice.

  • I sure will miss those butts though.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Bitching Around Work

What I really want to do is bitch ABOUT work, but I do like my job (most of the time, just not today), and also like being able to, you know, support my family. Instead, I will bitch AROUND work, which probably makes no sense to anyone who is not me. Here is a list of all of the things that bug me, that do not actually have any real substance and therefore (hopefully) won't get me fired.


  • This place is like fort knox at night. I was working late and I forgot my badge when I stepped out to pick up dinner. It took me 45 minutes to get back in (the security guard had stepped away and none of the people who were coming/going recognized me so they wouldn't let me in. Jerks.)


  • The vending machines take credit cards, but the cafeteria doesn't. You either have to carry cash at all times or get a gift card thingie that always seems to demagnetize when you have like $100 left on it. Then you have to sit there when the cashier types in the wrong number every single day and everyone else behind you gets pissy.


  • We used to have an ATM machine that a) only worked one out of three times and b) took about 18 minutes to get money out of. Now we have no ATM and I miss that POS.


  • All of the lights have motion sensors instead of good, old fashioned light switches. This has resulted in me sitting there, boobs hanging out while I wave my arms wildly in the dark ass pumping room.


  • I have bitched about the pumping room many a time, but let me reiterate. It sucks. And I am sorry if yours is worse, but lets all agree that ANY level of suckage is not acceptable, and that we ALL deserve pumping rooms that aren't in a bathroom or a conference room or behind a stack of files in an otherwise open area, with a fridge dedicated to milk and a locking door so the room is only accessible by other pumpers.


  • From April through September, the mulch smell is overpowering.


  • The landscapers also have a penchant for those bushes that smell like cat pee.


  • Casual fridays are stupid. If it's acceptable to wear jeans one day a week, it should be okay all of the days. We are grown adults, we promise to dress nice if we have a real meeting.


  • The internet filters are sexist. Tell me, powers that be, why is ESPN not blocked but pinterest is?


  • We are running a version of internet explorer that is so old google won't support it and now google reader doesn't work. In addition to that killing my ability to read blogs effectively, I actually do have a legitimate business need for it. UPDATE THAT SHIT!


  • Also under the "things I have already bitched about" category, all of the good parking spots are for hybrids or carpoolers. Our side of the building gets the shaft compared to the other lots. REDISTRIBUTE THAT SHIT!


  • While my office supply situation has dramatically improved since the last admin was in charge, it's still not ideal. Pretty post it notes and pens that actually write make my day infinitely better.


  • This building will be the first to blow away in the event of a tornado. There was an earthquake in VIRGINIA and our whole building swayed in OHIO. Like, a lot.


  • When it rains it sounds like we are in a tin can.


  • CREEPIEST DRAIN NOISES EVER, OMG. It did this when I was by myself, working late:

video