Monday, July 30, 2012

Birthday Party Planning for Second Children

Sooooooooo, Lucia is going to be one on August 14.  So far my party planning process has gone like this:  

1) Look at calendar
2) Swear
3) Count the days until Lucy's birthday
4) Swear again
5) Briefly consider looking for first birthday ideas on pinterest
6) Laugh at the ridiculousness of that idea
7) Briefly consider stealing first birthday pictures from pinterest and photoshopping Lucy into them
8) Discard that idea because it's probably more work than throwing a party would be
9) Briefly consider throwing the girls a combined birthday on September 14 since their birthdays are August 14 and October 14
10) Feel bad because I wasn't planning on doing that until next year (we made a big deal about Adriana's first birthday, and I wanted to do the same for Lucia)
11) Go to local Mexican restaurant for lunch, since I eat my feelings
12) Hey!  They have a back room!
13) Convince waiter to let us have party at Mexican restaurant
14) Get hopes up that Lucy's party might not entirely suck
15) Ask for catering menu
16) Find out that there is no catering menu; I'm supposed to read their regular a la carte prices and then make an offer / negotiate / haggle
17) Fuck that
18) Look at calendar
19) Swear
20) Blog

Needless to say, this is not going well.  

Also, question for you all...

Crazy MIL has only met L 3 times (when she was 2 months old, thanksgiving, and 4th of July).  She has made no effort to have any sort of relationship with her.  Efforts from the rest of that side of the family have been minimal.  Is it okay to only invite Justin's dad's side and my side? It gets a little tricky because his aunts on his dad's side are friends with his mom.  That whole side of the family stresses me out because they never RSVP so I have to plan for all of them to come, and then 98% of them don't, and I'd really just rather not deal with it.  I fight with myself constantly about this, and always end up inviting them and trying to be the bigger person.  But I get REALLY STRESSED about the whole thing and generally end up wishing I hadn't bothered.  Every year.  Ugh. 

UPDATE: Justin's response: We have to invite them.  90% won't show up anyway.  Cue anxiety attack.  [They will all show up and we won't have enough food or space!  They won't show up and we will have too much food! They will show up and MIL wants to be a part of our lives again! Everyone will buy too many presents and our house will be overtaken by toys! They will come and drink too many margaritas and act inappropriately!  They won't come and I will have wasted stamps and invitations!] 


d e v a n said...

I wish there was a way to FORCE people to RSVP... like tell them party is in this general location @ this time on date. When you call/email to RSVP I'll send you the rest of the details. hehe

Don't invite MIL if dh doesn't care. Just leave that whole side out, since they obviously aren't invested anyway.

Ellen said...

Don't invite them and reduce your stress. You deserve (at least) that much of a break!

P.S. Your 20 items cracked me up!

Heather said...

Agree, not worth the stress so long as Justin is ok with some of his family not being invited.

I'm only inviting select family members to Tory's birthday party, but it's a little easier for me since I live in a different state than my entire family.

Michelle said...

Oh these poor second babies. I was the same way with Gizmo. It was not nearly the BIG DEAL as it was for her sister.

Also, I think as long as your husband is OK with it, I say invite just the people who won't stress you out. As someone who is 24 hours removed from a kid's birthday party, you need to reduce your stress as much as possible.

Victoria Kidson said...

Agreed! Keep the stress out of the kids party planning. On the day try to relax a little and enjoy the fun!

Jessica said...

Sounds like Paul's first birthday! I planned an elaborate 3rd birthday for Margaret, then realized Paul's was in 3 weeks and I had...nothing. It was very simple. Bakery cake, store-bought banner, paper plates. We did make the food, but kept it simple. All 1-year-olds need is a cake/cupcake to smash anyway, right?

Emily said...

I think I had the same timeline for R's birthday party this year...and his baptism that's happening on Sunday that I haven't done a single thing for...Good luck!

Erica said...

Ooof, this post was stressful. I still have three months until Ivy is one, but it's already looming a bit. I also have (minor) issues with in-laws and their inability to plan ahead.

Saly said...

Poor Hannah has always shared her party with Cait. What I must be doing to her.

It sucks that you have to invite everyone. Suuuuuuks!

Also--I always forget that Adriana and i share a birthday. It's a good day!

Ann said...

I'm the lone duck here. I agree with have to invite them. He's right though, probably half of them won't come (which is usually how it happens with family). Actually, that's how I have time to read your blog right now...all of the family is downtown in Kansas City eating out while I'm at home enjoying some time to myself because I was sick...cough.

Wiz said...

This is hilarious! Especially since Sula's bday is coming up. I have lots and lots of ideas but right now, they are just that ideas...sigh.

And I never feel an obligation to invite family. Just because your family doesn't mean you dont suck. We wont invite John's brother and family because they suck and we wont invite my dad because he is an alcoholic, I plan to have booze, and I am not going to babysit to make sure he stays away from the table, ha. BUT if its going to be a fight with the hubs, then maybe I would reconsider. My husband are on the same page with the above mentioned family.

Thanks for all your comments. I dont know how to respond because I dont think I have your email, but you crack me up and I love that you have two brothers? I have one brother and wouldnt have it any other way. Did you like growing up with boys??