Thursday, September 26, 2013

September 2013 Spicy Subscriptions Review

This box was sent to me for review courtesy of Spicy Subscriptions.  I love them for this despite the fact that they made me say "cock ring" on my (mostly) family friendly blog.

Spicy Subscriptions is my very favorite box to review, and it's not even makeup!  I was a leeeeeeeeeetle nervous when they contacted me to see if I wanted to review another box, because I knew the September box was the "Screaming O" box.  This sounded quite a bit racier than the boxes I was sent last September and February.  Then I did some googling to see what they had been giving out lately and SWEET BABY JESUS there was a butt plug! My mom reads this blog!  Granted, I have the kind of family who will sit around playing Cards Against Humanity or reading Urban Dictionary aloud for kicks, but even so, moms and butt plugs don't mix. (That should totally be a t-shirt). 

Hey, Mom, if you're still here?  Go away.  LOVE YOU!  xoxo, your daughter who only had sex twice ever to make your sweet grandbabies. 

The deets: Spicy Subscriptions changed up the products a bit since last time.  It looks like they ditched the smaller premium spice box and only the deluxe box remains.  They added a new toy of the month option too, so I'm guessing people liked it when SS started offering the big toys.  I think the 5% off diniwilks code should still work - I'll double check ASAP. 

Get the Spice Box: $34.95/month
Get the
Deluxe Toy Of The Month: $37.95/month

Date of arrival: September 26, 2013.

Packaging: It came in a discreet priority mail envelope with the box below inside.  It's a really nice, sturdy box, but it's a shade less fancy than the one I received in February.  I still love the design. 

Looks like Spicy Subscriptions has a great referral program and bonus for doing reviews.  Nice!!
I knew from the very first product in the box that this whole review is going to read like a giant game of "I never".  I'll start.  I have never had sex with someone wearing a cock ring before.  And I never thought I'd say cock ring on my blog.  I am, however, delighted to have one.  It looked a little small (you're welcome, hubs), but it says it's super stretchy so we'll see how it goes.  Also, I am DYING LAUGHING over that picture on the back (middle right of the image below).  I have always said I wanted to be the graphic designer who made the warning image of the vending machine tipping on a person, but I think this one takes the cake.  Or cock.  Whatever. 
This cock ring is brought to you by the brand "Screaming O"
It really wouldn't be a Spice Box without some lube.  The Jo brand and I go way back.  It's perfectly lovely, as far as lubes go. 

YAY, some Dona products!!!  Dona makes my very favorite sexy time product ever, the linen spray.  I talked about my love of the sexy spray in both of my past reviews, and I am still a huge fan.   I am super duper excited to have some bath essences because it's nice to pamper yourself before some nookie. 

I was also sent some Lingerie Wash, which I believe is a bonus gift.  You are supposed to soak your lingerie in it before hand washing them, but let's get real.  Ain't nobody got time for that!!  I plan to throw some in when I'm washing our sheets and then spraying the sheets in more sexy spray as I roll around in them with my sexy bath essenced up body.  It will be a sexy time triple threat. 

For real, get yourself some sexy spray.  You will NOT regret it. The scent I adore is mangosteen and they appear to be out but you really can't go wrong. 

Notice the runaway lube in the background
 If you have to send me lube samples in the dreaded foil packet (SO HARD TO OPEN IN THE DARK), I want lube with names that amuse me.  Both of these did. 

Okay, now for Screaming O product #2.  This one is a bullet with 4 speeds.  I love that it is disguised as a compact, because I can totally picture someone's friend going to borrow the mirror, and the owner sitting there horrified as the bullet falls out and clatters to the floor.  But this is coming from someone whose vibrator is literally sitting out on the nightstand.  I mean, it would be if I owned one.  (You're not still here, Mom, are you?) 

The third and final Screaming O product is this Cooling O Balm, which is also (hilariously) disguised as an eye shadow single.  It says on the package that you can put some on your lips and kiss, or you can put it anywhere you want a cool, tingly sensation. 

Side note: I had to use my hubby's laptop to post this because it seemed a little unwise to post such scandalous material from my work laptop.   WTF - the icon for me is a freaking DOG.  SOMEONE is not getting a cool, tingly blowie tonight. 

 So what do you think?  Is this box too spicy, not spicy enough, or just right? 


Brittany said...

I want one and have been trying to talk my Honey into getting one.. I think your post convinced him so thank you!

Anonymous said...

Is anyone else having trouble accessing their account? I get an error message everytime!!

Karen Box said...

Fabulous box! I totally want one now. And not just for the cock ring illustrations, I swear.